In honor of my monster-in-law's recent 5.... yes I said 5 fracking day visit, I am putting together this handy list. Here are the absolute, fully proven and tested, ways to tick me off in a matter of seconds!
* Yes... these happened... most in the same day.... hell, some were even in the same HOUR!!*
- Go into my kitchen for a drink, open the fridge and spend the next 10 minutes staring at the 10 different forms of beverages I so nicely made sure were stocked just for your visit... during 80 degree weather, in a super hot apartment... go ahead and ignore that I pay for that electricity you are wasting so freely. THEN... close the fridge, grab one of the 2 liters I have set aside for the future and just help yourself.... again, disregard the already open beverages in the fridge... pour a glass and add some ice...THEN .... turn to me and ask if its OK if you open this bottle of soda.
- When you are preparing for your visit and tell us you want to see the sights when you come, don't bother looking them up online.. cuz you know, we just LOVE planning your trip for you. We will ask you if you want to see this or that, feel free to respond with " oh.... Whatever you want to see is fine"... BUT when you get here and we tell you the times we need to head to each place, do get up an hour before us and just sit there. Don't worry, we won't mind if you decide to finally get ready to go 5 minutes before we need to catch the bus. .. everyone must love to be late for things just like you....
- You need to plug in your laptop? Well go right ahead and unplug anything you like! I really don't mind if my laptop is dead or my cell phone isn't charged. Its not like I need either of those things at all!
- Go right ahead and use the washing machine. Completely disregard the green settings and use the super hot water on large load settings, for your tiny amount of clothes.... Honestly, the environment doesn't care and neither do we... our water bill can totally take the spike
- You want something to eat? Go through all my cupboards and open a few things. Its really no biggie to me to have a ton of spoiled food because too many things are open at once and won't get eaten in time. Oh and.... go ahead and listen to me tell my 13 year old to only have 1 cereal box open at a time... then go open the 2 others because you open one and don't like it, but the other might be better. My kid can totally eat all three boxes after you leave, before they go bad. Really.
- If you have a question or need something, just stand in the middle of the living room, spin in circles, looking confused, with 3 of us in the same room with you waiting for you to simply use your words..... for 30 minutes. Then go sit on the couch, sighing loudly for the next 20 minutes. We are all mind readers in this house, we just know your needs or wants, with a 30 minute delay!
- After being told that when the window is open, you have to hold the front door to close it or it will slam, hard.... go ahead and let it slam EVERY time you go in or out. Our neighbors don't care, even at 1 am! Oh and go ahead and lock the door behind me when I go downstairs for 5 minutes to check the mail. I just love having to dig out my keys when I come back up... really, its no bother.
- When we let you pick the movie, please feel free to complain for hours, after we watch your choice and its too violent for you. We did warn you several times, but we don't mind whining, its our most favorite way of communication ever!
* Special note: also, when I say something to you about it and you say " Oh, I didn't know..." Keep in mind I will admonish you like a child. I have a kid who I don't get to talk to like a child, I miss it, so as you will act like a 5 year old, I'm all too happy to treat you like one*
This list is some of MANY incidents that occurred these last 5 days..... The monster leaves tomorrow morning... THANK THE GODS!!!
Sunday, July 7, 2013
Tuesday, December 4, 2012
Mandi Rae's Top Horror Flick Recommendations
Mandi Rae's Top Horror Flick Recommendations
Here is my personal list of horror movies, that I highly recommend, in no particular order:
Cabin In The Woods
Silent Hill
Carrie- The Original
Scream
Saw
IT
Insidious
Child's Play
28 Days Later
There are a million more, because I just LOVE horror movies. These are just a few that I really love, out of nostalgia or true creepiness.
Here is my personal list of horror movies, that I highly recommend, in no particular order:
Cabin In The Woods
Carrie- The Original
Scream
IT
Insidious
Child's Play
28 Days Later
There are a million more, because I just LOVE horror movies. These are just a few that I really love, out of nostalgia or true creepiness.
Drag Me To Hell.... another DVD Movie Review
WARNING: SPOILERS BELOW. IF YOU DON'T WANT TO KNOW, THEN DON'T BOTHER READING ANY FURTHER. I DO TRY TO GIVE AS LITTLE AS POSSIBLE AWAY, BUT I DO HAVE A BIG MOUTH, SO TO SPEAK, SO ODDS ARE, I WILL GIVE AWAY PLENTY. READ ON AT YOUR OWN RISK!!!!
So, for my next horror movie review.... Drag Me To Hell.
I adore a good freaky movie, just as much as the next guy, and this one was interesting. For me, horror movies HAVE to be filled with blood, guts, and gore.... and this one, well... it has two out of the three.
Drag Me To Hell made me cringe. Yes, most of it was predictable, BUT there were scenes that had me fairly close to running to the bathroom holding my mouth.
First, let me touch a bit on the actors.... Justin Long is usually a comedic actor. The guys is insanely funny... but he fell flat for me in this flick. I really liked him in Jeepers Creepers as the main character, but here, he plays the leading man and is just on the bland side. Alison Lohman, on the other had, was fantastic. I swear, I would NOT have wanted to be her in some of the more gross scenes. I give her major props for having to be slobbered on by a dead old lady for a lot of the movie! On that note, Lorna Raver was so creeptastic as the old lady in question.
Now, for the scene that made me go ewwwwww.... I usually don't get sick to my stomach from a movie. This one scene made me throw up a little in my mouth and took me a while to get my gag reflex back under control. I don't know how Alison Lohman did it, but having an old, dead woman throw up maggots and other nasty thing, into my mouth and all over my face..... well, every meal I had eaten in the last month, would have been coming back up! Add that too having the old woman gum and goo slimey stuff all over my chin and face..... *cringe*.
I do have to say, a major downside to the movie was the poorly done CGI. Most of it, like the many things that were spit in Alison's face, looked so fake, that I was NOT impressed. I have seen so many movies with far better CGI.....
All in all, it was a pretty good horror flick. I don't recommend it as highly as I do others, but its still a good watch for those days when you just need a little gore in your life.
So, for my next horror movie review.... Drag Me To Hell.
I adore a good freaky movie, just as much as the next guy, and this one was interesting. For me, horror movies HAVE to be filled with blood, guts, and gore.... and this one, well... it has two out of the three.
Drag Me To Hell made me cringe. Yes, most of it was predictable, BUT there were scenes that had me fairly close to running to the bathroom holding my mouth.
First, let me touch a bit on the actors.... Justin Long is usually a comedic actor. The guys is insanely funny... but he fell flat for me in this flick. I really liked him in Jeepers Creepers as the main character, but here, he plays the leading man and is just on the bland side. Alison Lohman, on the other had, was fantastic. I swear, I would NOT have wanted to be her in some of the more gross scenes. I give her major props for having to be slobbered on by a dead old lady for a lot of the movie! On that note, Lorna Raver was so creeptastic as the old lady in question.
Now, for the scene that made me go ewwwwww.... I usually don't get sick to my stomach from a movie. This one scene made me throw up a little in my mouth and took me a while to get my gag reflex back under control. I don't know how Alison Lohman did it, but having an old, dead woman throw up maggots and other nasty thing, into my mouth and all over my face..... well, every meal I had eaten in the last month, would have been coming back up! Add that too having the old woman gum and goo slimey stuff all over my chin and face..... *cringe*.
I do have to say, a major downside to the movie was the poorly done CGI. Most of it, like the many things that were spit in Alison's face, looked so fake, that I was NOT impressed. I have seen so many movies with far better CGI.....
All in all, it was a pretty good horror flick. I don't recommend it as highly as I do others, but its still a good watch for those days when you just need a little gore in your life.
Thursday, September 20, 2012
Movie Review: The Cabin In The Woods
SO I have decided to start reviewing movies, when I get bored enough to care. My first is going to be THIS one, obviously!
WARNING: SPOILERS BELOW. IF YOU DON'T WANT TO KNOW, THEN DON'T BOTHER READING ANY FURTHER. I DO TRY TO GIVE AS LITTLE AS POSSIBLE AWAY, BUT I DO HAVE A BIG MOUTH, SO TO SPEAK, SO ODDS ARE, I WILL GIVE AWAY PLENTY. READ ON AT YOUR OWN RISK!!!!
I recently rented The Cabin In The Woods..... mainly because I am a huge Whedonite. What is a Whedonite you ask? Well its simple: a Whedonite worships and salivates over everything Joss Whedon has his hands in.... and everyone who knows me on a personal level, knows how massive of a Buffy the Vampire Slayer fan i am. Those who don't know me, well, I will just say 2 words: action figures. Enough said there!
So back to the movie, which was written, produced, and directed by.... dun dun dududun... Joss Whedon! Now, every fan of Mr.Whedon knows, he often has actors from his popular tv series' pop up in his movies. This one was no exception. Amy Acker, who appeared in both Angel and Dollhouse, Tom Lenk who is one of my FAVORITE actors from the Buffyverse, Fran Kranz who appeared on Dollhouse, and a recent addition to the Whedon family, Chris Hemsworth whom we ALL know as Thor from Avengers. Add in the super sexy Jesse Williams from Greys Anatomy and the incomperable Sigourney Weaver and you have a steller cast! Now I do have to give props to Bradley Whitford and Jodelle Ferland as well. Jodelle played Samara from the Silent Hill Movie, Case 39, a small role of Bree in Twilight Saga: Eclipse, and numorous others. She is the perfect creepy zombie girl!
So, in addition to a great cast, the plot line is one hell of a twister. The previews gave so little of the story away that it seemed like your typical kids party in the woods, killer attacks, all die bloody deaths except one. Well, if thats where you thought this movie was going..... you were WRONG!
I LOVE movies with a good twist and I can tell you, Whedon delivers. Yes, there is plenty of blood. Obviously there are zombies of some form involved, because I sort of gave that one away earlier, but the rest is so different from the usual horror films you see, that I was in awe!
Its very hard for me to not go more indepth and give the whole thing away, but I will give you this much.... how the movie starts before the main title sequence will make you go.. "ummm what? Did I put in the right movie?" Trust me... it gets slightly odder from there, but it is soooo worth it!
Lions Gate films are usually hit or miss, never in between, and this one was a major HIT. Rent it, hell, BUY it, if you like twists, blood, reality tv, a short tit shot (for the gents), and Jesse William's amazing eyes and shirtless body (for the gals)!!!
A+++++++++
WARNING: SPOILERS BELOW. IF YOU DON'T WANT TO KNOW, THEN DON'T BOTHER READING ANY FURTHER. I DO TRY TO GIVE AS LITTLE AS POSSIBLE AWAY, BUT I DO HAVE A BIG MOUTH, SO TO SPEAK, SO ODDS ARE, I WILL GIVE AWAY PLENTY. READ ON AT YOUR OWN RISK!!!!
I recently rented The Cabin In The Woods..... mainly because I am a huge Whedonite. What is a Whedonite you ask? Well its simple: a Whedonite worships and salivates over everything Joss Whedon has his hands in.... and everyone who knows me on a personal level, knows how massive of a Buffy the Vampire Slayer fan i am. Those who don't know me, well, I will just say 2 words: action figures. Enough said there!
So back to the movie, which was written, produced, and directed by.... dun dun dududun... Joss Whedon! Now, every fan of Mr.Whedon knows, he often has actors from his popular tv series' pop up in his movies. This one was no exception. Amy Acker, who appeared in both Angel and Dollhouse, Tom Lenk who is one of my FAVORITE actors from the Buffyverse, Fran Kranz who appeared on Dollhouse, and a recent addition to the Whedon family, Chris Hemsworth whom we ALL know as Thor from Avengers. Add in the super sexy Jesse Williams from Greys Anatomy and the incomperable Sigourney Weaver and you have a steller cast! Now I do have to give props to Bradley Whitford and Jodelle Ferland as well. Jodelle played Samara from the Silent Hill Movie, Case 39, a small role of Bree in Twilight Saga: Eclipse, and numorous others. She is the perfect creepy zombie girl!
So, in addition to a great cast, the plot line is one hell of a twister. The previews gave so little of the story away that it seemed like your typical kids party in the woods, killer attacks, all die bloody deaths except one. Well, if thats where you thought this movie was going..... you were WRONG!
I LOVE movies with a good twist and I can tell you, Whedon delivers. Yes, there is plenty of blood. Obviously there are zombies of some form involved, because I sort of gave that one away earlier, but the rest is so different from the usual horror films you see, that I was in awe!
Its very hard for me to not go more indepth and give the whole thing away, but I will give you this much.... how the movie starts before the main title sequence will make you go.. "ummm what? Did I put in the right movie?" Trust me... it gets slightly odder from there, but it is soooo worth it!
Lions Gate films are usually hit or miss, never in between, and this one was a major HIT. Rent it, hell, BUY it, if you like twists, blood, reality tv, a short tit shot (for the gents), and Jesse William's amazing eyes and shirtless body (for the gals)!!!
A+++++++++
Monday, July 18, 2011
Yes... I'll pay you to NOT watch my kid
Ok so, went to the mall today to meet up with my sister and her 3 kids (ages 1, 3 and 6). It was a seemingly usual trip.... Kiara being silly and screeching cuz it echo'd, Kaleb being a booger, and Kalista wanting to go and see everything.
Well, after lunch we went to the little area where they have these giant climbing toys, so the kids could play for a bit. The rules of this place say you have to be 6 or under age wise and accompanied by an adult. We get there and there's these 7 or 8 kids... big kids, definitely some were over 6, for sure, running and trampling over all the little ones, screaming and all around being brats of the highest level. So I'm looking around, trying to find a parent, expecting to see their faces shoved in their phone texting or just not paying attention at all, but I don't see one. ( side note: the kids were of color so, that's kinda, how I knew what to look for parent-wise, no racism intended by any means)
THEN a security guard shows up and he goes over to talk to a few of the kids and calls in 3 more security guards who then have everyone in the area round up their kids so they can see who claims them. No one did. Come to find out, from talking to one of the guards, the kids were with their teacher (assuming daycare) and she was off shopping in a store almost half way across the mall! She just left them there, alone!!!
The security guard got a description of her outfit from the kids and announced her name over the PA, but she still didn't come. They found her in a store and sent her back for the kids after a bit. The woman had to be19-22 years old and she was alone with that many kids on a trip to the mall?
If people pay her to watch their kids, I hope they rethink that one ASAP and ask for a refund..... As my sister pointed out, she came for the kids them sat down and stayed there letting them play more.... why didn't she get them and hurry away out of embarrassment? I sure would have, but then again, I wouldn't leave my kid unattended just to shop....
People these days make me want to punch them in the face and scream " are you a total effing moron????!?!?!" Thats it for my rant today!
Well, after lunch we went to the little area where they have these giant climbing toys, so the kids could play for a bit. The rules of this place say you have to be 6 or under age wise and accompanied by an adult. We get there and there's these 7 or 8 kids... big kids, definitely some were over 6, for sure, running and trampling over all the little ones, screaming and all around being brats of the highest level. So I'm looking around, trying to find a parent, expecting to see their faces shoved in their phone texting or just not paying attention at all, but I don't see one. ( side note: the kids were of color so, that's kinda, how I knew what to look for parent-wise, no racism intended by any means)
THEN a security guard shows up and he goes over to talk to a few of the kids and calls in 3 more security guards who then have everyone in the area round up their kids so they can see who claims them. No one did. Come to find out, from talking to one of the guards, the kids were with their teacher (assuming daycare) and she was off shopping in a store almost half way across the mall! She just left them there, alone!!!
The security guard got a description of her outfit from the kids and announced her name over the PA, but she still didn't come. They found her in a store and sent her back for the kids after a bit. The woman had to be19-22 years old and she was alone with that many kids on a trip to the mall?
If people pay her to watch their kids, I hope they rethink that one ASAP and ask for a refund..... As my sister pointed out, she came for the kids them sat down and stayed there letting them play more.... why didn't she get them and hurry away out of embarrassment? I sure would have, but then again, I wouldn't leave my kid unattended just to shop....
People these days make me want to punch them in the face and scream " are you a total effing moron????!?!?!" Thats it for my rant today!
Friday, July 1, 2011
( . ) ( . ).... yes, those are exactly what they look like!
" Blah, blah, blah *looks down* blah, blah, blah, blah *looks down* blah, blah, blah, blah *looks down* blah, blah, blah, blah "
Last night, after a bit of fooling around and a majorly happy, happy ending for all, I decided to test something. I tossed on a top and left my bra where ever it had landed on the mess of our bedroom floor and proceeded to go fiddle around in the kitchen. Brian, of course, followed and he started in on some story of some form, as I knew he inevitably would.
Now normally, when he gets all long winded and technical, I keep doing whatever it is I'm doing and nod a lot, BUT, this time, I watched his face. Specifically, his eyes.
I swear that every 4 or 5 words, he looked down. Heck, so I wasn't wearing a bra, right, but my top covered everything.. Couldn't even see a peek of cleavage at all! Apparently, it was a lil chilly, so my nipples were like magnets for his eyes.
Whats up with that?
I mean, we JUST got done messing around with them bare for all the world to see.... he sees them everyday, bare, partially covered, covered.... its not like he is boob deprived in the least. Yet he had to keep looking. I gotta admit, I do like to distract him some with em, he is a total boob man, but I wasn't even trying this time! Funny thing is, I noticed he does this even when I'm wearing a bra and fully clothed, so, I guess its his thing. Helps that I got mega jugs, lucky him!
So thats my rant or whatever for the day.... Who knows... and honestly... who cares?!
Last night, after a bit of fooling around and a majorly happy, happy ending for all, I decided to test something. I tossed on a top and left my bra where ever it had landed on the mess of our bedroom floor and proceeded to go fiddle around in the kitchen. Brian, of course, followed and he started in on some story of some form, as I knew he inevitably would.
Now normally, when he gets all long winded and technical, I keep doing whatever it is I'm doing and nod a lot, BUT, this time, I watched his face. Specifically, his eyes.
I swear that every 4 or 5 words, he looked down. Heck, so I wasn't wearing a bra, right, but my top covered everything.. Couldn't even see a peek of cleavage at all! Apparently, it was a lil chilly, so my nipples were like magnets for his eyes.
Whats up with that?
I mean, we JUST got done messing around with them bare for all the world to see.... he sees them everyday, bare, partially covered, covered.... its not like he is boob deprived in the least. Yet he had to keep looking. I gotta admit, I do like to distract him some with em, he is a total boob man, but I wasn't even trying this time! Funny thing is, I noticed he does this even when I'm wearing a bra and fully clothed, so, I guess its his thing. Helps that I got mega jugs, lucky him!
So thats my rant or whatever for the day.... Who knows... and honestly... who cares?!
Thursday, June 30, 2011
Guess I better tell you about me... and stuff
Lets see..... the basics: I'm 31, but I don't look it. I got a crazy 11 year old son, Chance. Got a boyfriend, Brian, who was formally my fiancee, but we hit a bump and now we are working our way back to the engaged status.... tortuously slowly. Two exceedingly mental cats, Precious and Sabrina, whom... I could and probably will, devote an entire blog too because they are insane. Just moved from a dust mite sized town into a suburb of Detroit. So... now I'm a city gal, I guess.
Bored yet? I am... so... lets see.... I think that covers the boring and uber dull crap in my life...
Let me say this, I'm going to rant and rave, it might be about something small and exceedingly lame, but its what I do. If you know me, and feel offended, remember this simple thing.... everyone gets twisted up and everyone complains, I'm just putting my inner crap out there for the world to see cuz, maybe, someone else can relate and it might give them a lil chuckle. Sorry if I tick ya off but, its probably a sign that you should stop reading and go find something else to do... rather than get all pissy at me for my thoughts.
With that... I'm off. Might write again later, might go read one of my books most people hate. Who knows... and honestly... who cares?!
Bored yet? I am... so... lets see.... I think that covers the boring and uber dull crap in my life...
Let me say this, I'm going to rant and rave, it might be about something small and exceedingly lame, but its what I do. If you know me, and feel offended, remember this simple thing.... everyone gets twisted up and everyone complains, I'm just putting my inner crap out there for the world to see cuz, maybe, someone else can relate and it might give them a lil chuckle. Sorry if I tick ya off but, its probably a sign that you should stop reading and go find something else to do... rather than get all pissy at me for my thoughts.
With that... I'm off. Might write again later, might go read one of my books most people hate. Who knows... and honestly... who cares?!
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)